A change? Anti-emancipation and real mates

November 3, 2017


When my grandmother was still a child, men were discussing politics and the world‘s fate. Before WW2 women were tied to the hearth and of little worth and use. When she was on the doorstep of being a woman, these men had gone off to fight a war. They left so much behind - so many hopes, dreams, and hearts were destroyed. When my grandmother was a woman, she was lucky enough to have a good-looking, healthy, hard-working survivor on her side. One with little knowledge of the skills useful in a peaceful society like writing and reading, but willing to be more than a soldier. She had by then developed male skills in order to survive, as women had to keep the country going. We all learned from our grandmothers‘ examples to be strong, independent - and even to do a man‘s job. 

Maybe it is now time to choose from both worlds to create the synthesis. A synthesis is the result of thesis and anti-thesis. The synthesis is much more than the sum of those two, it includes all the learnings, experiences, and individual ideas  of how the final outcome should be. So if we were to create a synthesis out of thesis - a female is to cook and give birth and otherwise of no worth nor use - and the antithesis - a female is the better man - in order to develop our strengths in full, what would happen? Should we even try? And why now? Follow me on a journey that might as well start with once upon a time.


Once upon a time, when we were all still connected to our hearts desires, we knew who we are and what we are good, excellent at, what the stars are we are longing for. No knowledge of right or wrong, no knowledge of expectations we were free to dream what we liked and be who we are.   



When I first started to write this article, it was all about women and my grandma. In the meanwhile, talking to a friend, another important aspect came into view: the world is becoming more threatening with really complex problems and it feels scary, maybe as scary as it was when my granny was about to become a woman. In order to avoid the dour consequences it might be time to bring something new into the game. Back then, men went off to fight. While there is nothing wrong with that, there were only a little who went off to war and still cared. That‘s what I learned from my granddad when he told me about the cruelties some men were willing to execute. These were men who forgot about the honour they were bound to. And hence gave way to the darkness. So now it is a story including both, the male and female aspect of a promising shift in the energy, a possibility, a promise. 


As it has been all throughout history women like my grandma managed without men as long as they were gone. Because that‘s what women do: they come together, help each other out, and develop strengths and abilities in areas they have no or little talent for. Believe me, some years ago I would have come after you for a sentence like that. But I came to understand how much more relaxing, beautiful, and right it is when a man takes his proper place and a woman steps back. It doesn‘t take from you, it gives to you. I have had so many discussions with my female friends of all ages and what they long for most is for gentlemen. They are fed up with men tricking them into a lousy business deal - not because of the bad deal, but because it‘s so wrong for a man to treat a woman like that. They are fed up with men who don‘t step up when a knight is needed. That‘s new - because years, maybe even months ago, no-one would have bothered. So there‘s a shift in the all-encompassing energy. Hence, this article, as a first tentative step to write about what this change in the energetic balance might mean or require. 


I had the chance to visit Canada recently. A very vast country, enormous in its dimensions especially when compared to tiny Austria. While I was in Toronto, the Invictus Games were on, people, heroes from all over the world coming together. Prince Harry was in town as well as Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton. Imagine the logistics! Tremendous. I do like it when I see how roads are blocked to give way to transport the participants of the Games, because it shows how intelligent and capable humans can be. 



But at one point, I got scared - a little. I don‘t like to admit it, because usually I am the cool one who doesn‘t scare easily. Whatever it was, why ever, I decided to give in to this weakness and ask one of the police if there was a security issue. He replied that no, there was none, and with a smile continued to explain it was just a bad day for driving as the Invictus Games were on and sth else - which I do not remember. My relief must have been obvious as maybe was my vulnerability. And then he said something that brought tears to my eyes. Not because of what he said, but how he said it. Two words, loaded with a world full of concern and my heart sang. 


„Take care.“ 


Isn‘t it beautiful? Isn‘t it nice to have someone who cares about your welfare? It‘s time for men to protect their women again, to be willing to care about those they love, but also to protect those who are weaker. In a way that could transform the world: the knight‘s way. 


Just like the knight in my fairytales - and I did feel more alive than before, because our polarities came together in a symphony meant to touch the heart and shape the world. 


There is a world we loose when we step into world being a man. My grandmother, and many of the war and post-war generation, had to do exactly that. And it was a gift that women developed this side as well, that we now have all there is - and can choose what we like. Because we are capable of just everything. Now that we have learned it all we can use the shift to become even more centred. We can be proud and self-assure enough to let go of what we don‘t want. Maybe you don‘t want the cleaning, but the cooking. A yes to all things technical but a no to building a balcony. Use the shift and choose. Just as we would in a job: I am definitely no accountant, but great with people. Of course I could do the book-keeping job, but would it make me happy? I chose to value my skills instead of my book-keeping weakness. 


There is a world we loose when we deny any side of us. A friend of mine has a soulmate relationship, they love each other and are so in tune. Yet the relationship is in real danger as he denies her his male energy. He looses the chance to make the world a better place, to add a sort of meaning to his existence that goes beyond financial success. 


Men and women are different. It is easy to see when it comes to bodily strength or when mama bear roars her head defending a cub. Women as well as men are powerful - and I think it would now be the time that supports those who are willing to live their strengths. Their differences. This requires change and faith in either men and women as the therefor required behaviour sometimes seems old-school and is often frowned upon. 

My grandmother was very old, and my granddad had long since passed away, when she realised that hard-work and saying no to him again and again when he asked her to join him on his train travels was not right for her. ,It would have been better to come with him, but now, what can I do?‘ Regrets are bitter, but when life comes to an end we see the things that really count: love, togetherness, the willingness to put your loved ones first. The interesting thing is it‘s now possible. 

Possible for men to gain more than they could dream of by conquering this unknown land of the brave hearts, for the meaning this will add to their lives. Possible for women, when they are open for these men, when they dare to choose their stars. Possible for the world to shift and possible to have care instead of war. 


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