Do you have to hit the bottom?
We often hear stories about someone who hit the bottom, lost it all or had to overcome a life-threatening disease. We admire these people, admire their strengths and are willing to accept them as heroes. As we should.
As it is, those extraordinary people are teaching us a wonderful lesson: we have the ability to overcome any obstacles life is putting in front of us.
Still, as I see those stories and how some people are influenced by said stories, I do get the impression that people sometimes get the wrong message. Before I tell you what this message is, let me explain the circumstances.
Life is a teacher. And life means well. Do you remember those teachers back in school you really respected? They treated you fair, demanded the best you had to give, respecting your boundaries but never letting you get away with less than they knew you could do?
I did have such a teacher and honest to God: sometimes she annoyed the hell out of me. Life can be the same. We are in the middle of a global change expanding our range of capabilities. But do we know what we are capable of? Do we even realize that we have a lot more tools, more internal knowledge, and more features we can use? Sometimes we don‘t.
Life – or whatever you call it, the Force, God, inner guidance – sees us and is dealing us the cards we are capable dealing with. Only we think we can‘t. The very fact makes for a rather stressful situation.
Combine this with the ongoing change – and change is never easy on any one – and you already feel exhausted just trying to align the facts. In such a situation it is easy to mix things up. To get it wrong.
And while I like a story of empowerment and victory as much as the next person, I don‘t want you to get the wrong message.
You don‘t have to loose it all. You don‘t have to give everything up. You just have to be true to yourself and your path, your way.
To paint a picture: think of what you want as a particular mountain top. Some of us have chosen the wrong path, a path to another mountain top. Hence, they are heading up a path that‘s not suitable. It is either too steep, too cold, too hot or just not right.
If you figure that out, you have two options: follow the path, because your are already up quite a bit, or going to find your path.
Option one is considered the easier choice. And sometimes even considered the right choice. As you have found a partner accepted by your social environment, as you are living a good life you should not give it up. People will frown on your thoughts and explain why you are wrong.
You are requested to ignore the feeling of uneasiness, the desire, even a strong urge to get it right. Because it will pass, it‘s just a bleep.
That‘s because right now there a just a few people willing to risk living a true life. As we are only at the beginning of this evolutional step you might not find what you looking for in others. It is a path, a decision fuelled by your inner wisdom and strength, by the core of your true self. And when did you last consult your inner wisdom fo rhelp? Your connection might have become a bit rusty. It might freak you out to listen to yourself. The path you want to follow might appear like a minefield and might mean to risk loosing some of what you accomplished. What for? For a destiny that is only promising in a far future? For true love, that might only trap you, might turn out to just be as wrong as the love you have? For going your way, something you never did before?
That‘s where some of us take the decision to follow the path they have chosen. And it is still good and easy. It fits like a well worn pair of jeans. And then you start disliking your jeans. But you feel you have come so far – even farther than before – and you just can‘t go back.
Well, you always can. You always have the right to choose your path. To do what you want and dream of.
Even if you chose the right path to your particular mountain top, you are not save. It then might happen that life asks you to prove yourself – and it feels like loosing it all. When all it is is just the next step on the ladder.
Why am I telling you all this? Personal development is getting harder. Harder because you might not know what you are capable of. You might even know what life requires, wants, offers. Still you just can‘t – cannot because you don‘t know, or because you are afraid. Or – and that‘s a harsh thing – life reminds you of a trauma and you freeze. An old but open wound that leaves you immobilized. Then do not seek help to overcome the obstacle. Seek help to overcome the state of shock or fear you are in. Because life you can handle.
I am telling you this because
You don‘t have to loose it all.
Just let go of the baggage you don‘t need, the old fears, the idea that you are meant to being alone.
You don‘t have to manage it yourself. The strength is there as is the guidance. But it is important to have a network of loving supporters and helpful like-minded people. So go out looking for your path, do what needs to be done and keep your eyes open for those people doing the same thing. You might one day call them friends, or family.